What Boundaries Can I Set to Help Keep My Children Safe While They Use Their New Electronics?

Can Electronics Lead to Pornography Addiction, Even With Boundaries in Place?

In short, the answer is yes. Children with parents who set strict boundaries and perform regular phone checks may still develop a porn addiction. But how? 

Electronics can be a dangerous playground for kids. For example, Xbox, Playstation, Instagram, TikTok, and Snapchat can provide quick access to adult material. Likewise, these platforms often aim to keep users hooked to generate longer screen time. As a result, their algorithms promote addictive behavior themes. Even with boundaries in place, the algorithms that lead to addictive behaviors are often unnoticeable. 

According to squarespace.com, 79% of accidental exposure to internet porn occurs in the home. Even with boundaries, filters, phone checks, and limits in place, exposure still happens. Often, exposure is accidental or innocent curiosity. However, not knowing what pornography is or the dangers of it could easily lead to more views.

So, as you decide which boundaries will be best for your family, keep in mind, the first line of defense may not be boundaries. Instead, communication and action plans may be much more effective. 

What Is Most Important to Communicate as I Set Boundaries With My Kids? 

It can be difficult to talk to your children about pornography, sex, and sex trafficking. However, in this day, the consequences of avoiding these conversations can be dangerous. Discussing these topics are as important as teaching them to avoid smoking, drugs, and underage drinking. So, before you dive into setting boundaries, it's important to first educate your kids about the dangers that come with internet access. In other words, help them understand the 'why' behind the rules you're going to put in place. 

You can begin talking to your kids about pornography at a young age. If you're uneasy discussing the topic, ask yourself why? By working through your feelings, you can foster a healthier discussion. Furthermore, as you practice talking about uncomfortable subjects, it can get easier. Likewise, you can create an environment where your kids feel safe enough to come to you with their questions. One of the best things you can communicate to your kids is that there is safety in talking to you about anything. Then, continue to show them that communication is good and that you want to talk to them.

What Boundaries Can I Set to Help Keep My Children Safe?

It's always a good idea to layout boundaries and expectations before you hand over their newest electronic to play with, even on Christmas. Likewise, it's important to communicate that there is safety in telling you if an issue arises.

There are many boundaries you may choose to put in place. Likewise, what matters to one family may not matter to another. However, an important component of setting any boundary is consistent enforcement. 

So, let's talk about some boundaries you may want to consider implementing. 

Many smartphones have parental controls that you can set. You may want to set boundaries with accounts they can set up and apps they download. Likewise, you may want to discuss the music and game ratings they're allowed to access. 

Next, you may want to set boundaries around friends with access to the internet. For example, you could have a plan in place in case a friend who doesn't have parental controls set shows them porn. You can role-play with your children so they know how to handle the situation. Doing so can help them feel confident with how to respond if they find themselves in this position. 

Another boundary to consider focuses on online gaming. Often, if you're playing online games, you're interacting with strangers. As a result, you may limit their play to friends only. Or, talk to them about what interactions with a stranger are ok, and not ok. 

Consider boundaries around privacy settings and what information they can share with others. Setting a boundary about sharing their location can be critical to their safety. 

Finally, you may want to consider setting boundaries regarding where electronics can go. For example, you may not want electronics in bedrooms or any room with a lock on the door. 

Some final thoughts about boundaries 

Setting boundaries isn't typically the fun part of being a parent. However, they are essential. While they can vary from family to family, their importance remains the same. Keeping our children safe from porn addiction, mental health issues, and sex trafficking seems to be harder than ever before. Yet, good communication and healthy boundaries seem to provide the best safety net possible. 

A final thought about setting boundaries is to be transparent with your children. If you're going to do phone checks, do them randomly, but first, let your children know you'll be asking for their phones at any given time to do so. This can help you maintain a level of trust with them. Likewise, if you're going to monitor their activity using an app, tell them what you're doing instead of keeping it a secret. A great way to nourish trust with your children is to be open and transparent with them. 

Remember, the purpose of boundaries isn't to instill fear or leave them full of curiosity. Instead, the goal is to find balance in keeping your kids safe while embracing all the great things the internet has to offer.